Before 55 this syndrome masquerades as America’s favorite game show, ‘Wheel of A-holes’. After 55 the syndrome devolves to ‘No! My retirement calendar is jammed full, get lost!’

BTW: ‘pristine windows’. Not a thing after 55, but if it is, change month to year.

“Imagine a gated community with dedicated parking spots and a community bus to take you to the mall.”

What Mall? This would be more like a bus trip to a vacant parking lot full of overgrown weeds, cavernous caves (potholes), aka a nature reclamation area. Further known as ‘nowhere’, including a great place to get rolled or shot.

“Imagine a pristine community of thunderously bad-mooded old farts just like you.”

Wait, there’s nothing imaginary about this.